Choose Chelsea!
Choose overbearing arrogance.
Choose winning 1 league title in 50 years and acting like you’ve won 10 in a row.
Choose spending 600,000,000 EUR in 3 years and claiming to have ‘earned’ success.
Choose playing the most boring football seen for years and having the cheek to claim that you are great.
Choose waving hands in the air trying to get opposition players booked at every opportunity.
Choose Claude Makelele constantly committing the ‘intelligent foul’ for 90 minutes.
Choose paying 35M EUR for Didier Dogface Drogba. Choose paying 28M EUR for Ricardo Carvalho. Choose spending 31M EUR on Shaun Wright-Phillips and desperately trying to convince yourselves that he’s worth it by begging for him to be in the England team ahead of Beckham. Choose wasting 15M EUR on Tiago.
Choose Terry and Fat Fwank spending 20 minutes doing their hair before each game and still looking ugly as sin.
Choose listing umpteen reasons why ćel$ky are so great and then admit to not supporting them before 2002.
Choose John Terry claiming to be the best defender in the world despite hiding behind Makelele for 90 minutes.
Choose claiming to be the most loyal fans in the country despite not even being able to sell out the pathetically small Stamford Bridge.
Choose to see yourselves as one of the giants of continental football when you've never even reached a European Cup final in your entire history.
Choose Fat Frank & Joe Cole and their complete inability to speak the English language.
Choose John Terry always looking confused when in an England shirt.
Choose Michael Essien and his bone shattering ‘challenges’ that go unpunished because he pretends to be injured.
Choose Fat Frank shooting whenever he gets the ball and then thinking he's God because he scores with 10 deflected free kicks every season.
Choose being the most disliked team in the history of the premiership.
Choose Chelsea.