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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
When you start getting on a bit (mid to late 20's uggggghhhh) you come to the conclusion that you never really were George Best reincarnated, the call from Fergie is never going to come, and that in fact, for the last 20 years, you've been pretty average and at times, just plain sh!te:howler:

This is the mindset that sees you entering into the world of social football. Jumpers for goal posts, grown men, in a park, beer bellies jiggling in fury over a throw in decision going the wrong way. Fixtures on a sunday afternoon, eyes blurry from an all night bender, prematch, half time, full time ciggies, strange substitutes who no one has ever seen, met or even talked to, winning man of the match, scoring the winning goal, being made captain.

Howling wind, gushing rain, praying for the phone call that tells you its been called off;) Replica shirts, gold chains, strange blend of sons and dads playing on the same team, shady looking geezers throwing up on the sideline. This is the world of the social footballer. So drop by, come on in and smell the chutney on the half time sarnie:D
 

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Fred Elliot said:
When you start getting on a bit (mid to late 20's uggggghhhh) you come to the conclusion that you never really were George Best reincarnated, the call from Fergie is never going to come, and that in fact, for the last 20 years, you've been pretty average and at times, just plain sh!te:howler:

Fred, I realized this when I was maybe 12 years old:D. I figure I will be playing in such a league in about 15 years or so;) :)
 

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on the BBC over here we've got a impressionist(not the artist type) called alistair mcgowan who impersonates various celebrities and also football pundits. your strange little outburst reminds me a bit of his impression of mark lawrensen. keep it up freddie.;)
 

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yeah great one :D


I do feel alot of relief for some reason if games are called off - i enjoy playing but sometimes its good not to have one of the coaches on your back yelling at you tackle more or pick up attacking runs. I'm sh1t at that but in Scotland sometimes its got to be 110% VISIBLE effort, running around like an idiot rather than playing more thoughtfully. Of course as everyone tells me, it is exactly this attitude of mine which means i will never go anywhere :D
 

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Yeah, one of the better things about not being in such a competitive team is that I don't get as much flack for not running like Davids for the entire game;)
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
What a shocker it was last Sunday. Three of us had been at a party till 5.00am and were pretty boozey when we arrived back at the house. A few zzzzzzs followed. What seemed like a few short hours later, I woke up and checked the clock to see what time it was, and panic quickly set in. 11.30am. Kick off was set for 1.00pm, and the ground was at least 45 minutes drive away.

High drama followed as we gathered our kit, and drove off, stopping along the way to get some Wendy's takeaways for Brunch. What a mistake. I had the new bacon and mushroom burger. uggghhh. The smell was so bad, I couldn't even contemplate the chips.


Got to the ground, and felt bad. Against my better judgement, I went on. By the 40 minute mark, I don't mind telling you I was feeling very rough. Half time sounded, and I crawled off. It was p!ssing down with rain by this time too. I promptly threw up under a tree, lay down, and immediately fell a sleep. Didn't wake up till 10 minutes before the end, when I was brought to by a drink bottle of water pouring on my face, and ordered on as a sub for the bloke who took my place for the second half. I actually had a good ten minutes, and laid on the pass for our 3rd goal (we lost 3-4). Typical of social football, I was given man of the match. I promptly sculled down the pitcher of beer that is the prize for man of the match, and went home feeling not half bad. All in all, a pretty good day;)
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Arriving at the ground for our latest match, I seriously wondered whether I was getting too old for this lark;) It was teaming down. A ludicrously bitter wind was whipping the ground (the bleedin' weather bloke seriously nixoned us over this one, fine day my ar$e) and the changing rooms were locked!

Somehow we made it onto the pitch, or should that be beach. There was more sand on there than the french riviera. Sliding tackles resulted in mild lesions, dribbling with the ball required greater feets of dexterity and skill as you avoided both the opposition's challenges and the odd patch of quick sand.

Both teams, bedraggled, worn out, tired and disinterested, dragged themselves from the sideline, and lined up for the start of the game. Goals rained a plenty. So did the rain, funnily enough. Still, at least the bar was open afterwards;)
 

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Originally posted by Fred Elliot
Still, at least the bar was open afterwards
Now that is the type of commitment and dedication to our wonderful game that we need to see :howler: :howler: :howler:
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
bigscotty said:

Now that is the type of commitment and dedication to our wonderful game that we need to see :howler: :howler: :howler:
funniest thing I ever saw, was our goalie conceeding a goal when he turned around to the dirction of the clubhouse to shout out his orders to the barman for full time (2 minutes away at the time). Horrendous at the time, hilarious in retrospect;)
 

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i remember when i was playing at school a couple of years ago in the summer, and the goalie was a bit thick and was otherwise known as trigger (Only Fools And Horses). anyway, someone took a long short, he came out to get it 20 yards from goal and the ball bounced straight over his head! one of the funniest things i've seen before!:D
 

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Fred that is funny as fu*k. :howler: :howler: :howler:
 

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dog turd on the pitch, getting changed in the back of a car, everyone wearing different coloured socks, 22 man brawls.....oh how i wish it was the football season....
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
its the football season over here mate, get on over. If you can put up with getting changed under a tree, in the rain, with a pair of shorts a size too small, a shirt 5 sizes too big, socks that would test the patience and wisdom of solomon to get on, manky water bottles, manky water in the water bottles, the game ending anywhere from 2 to 10 minutes early depending on how busy the bar in the club room is getting, then we'll sign you up like a shot;)
 

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Actually, I need to find one of those social football leagues. I just joined a local soccer assocaition for fun, exercise and some competition and goddam I'm out of my league. For now, anyway. I forgot how much f*cking running you do. My legs are dead after 20 minutes and I can't even lift a foot to dribble.


Of course, it's freaking Florida with 90+ temps and humidity to make yer balls ache, so who knows? If I'm still feeling this "old" in another couple of weeks, then I better head to the badminton court or something. :D
 

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lol
im 16 n i have been meaning to join a club for ages well
my mate invited me to go to training with his club

well its summer ere n for sum reason its alwayz hot n humid for our training only been twice

in 2 sessions

lol

but boy its knackering ( part reason im lazy, lol ) need exercise so im doing it

but this week was easyer than last week even tho i did feel sick this week lol

i havent signed on yet tho lol
im gonna wait for them to ask me....
then ill have to but some boots cuz i aint got none yet lol
 

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i haven't even started pre-season training yet. my sunday team is starting this sunday, but i don't think i'll be playing for them again this season. as for my saturday team, god knows when they start!:confused:

at the weekend my mate asked me to play in a piss-about match against the local under-14's. i played the first half and then refereed the second, without any linesmen i might add. wasn't easy at ell, especially when you consider how little i've refereed in the past.:D
 

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liverpool4ever said:
i am still 15 ,but i already think i lost the chance 2 play 4 any kind of team coz i dont think there r any such amatuer leagues here in the UAE coz the real football league isn't even amatuer :tongue:
doesn't mean you can't set one up. find a sponsor and find someone with some sort of experience and you could be a legend in your own right!
 
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