Joined
·
23,352 Posts
Those us old enough to remember the year when the season was coming to a close and it was a question of whether we would be able to qualify for the CL. I remember how depressed I was when I made a thread about it.
Now, thanks to Koeman's kung fu, we are in not such a delectable position. It's a bit like a parent going from "is my kid gonna make it to college?" to "is my kid gonna be a beggar in the street?". Not quite the development you might wish for.
We are six short rounds from the end and it doesn't look good at all. I give you attached Exhibit A, our impressive league form. Based on which I will (and you, at your leisure, may find it amusing to do likewise) fill in the scores for our remaining matches.
Athletic -- Valencia 3-1 => 5-1
Athletic, do we ever beat them, even on good form? They are way too badass for us, especially now.
Valencia -- Osasuna 0-1 => 3-0
Yet another no brainer that will go the same way as Almeira, Racing and the others.
Barcelona -- Valencia 2-2 => 6-0
What we lack in efficiency, we make up for in holding grudges. Even though Barcelona is already completely out of the race, we will still insist on being the unwelcome guest.
Valencia -- Zaragoza 2-1 => 1-0
Zaragoza should be fighting for their life. Instead they are wallowing in depression at the inevitable. They will take one last shot at staving off relegation, and we will find just enough energy to put them down.
Levante -- Valencia 1-0 => 1-5
Levante is doing even worse than Zaragoza. In theory, this could be our chance to push off the bottom of the pool on the shoulders of the guy who's already drowned. Instead, they will rally and overrun us.
Valencia -- Atlético 1-1 => 3-1
Atletico is the laughing stock of the country. This year we are so sad no one would even laugh at us. But since they are hunting for a CL spot, and seeing as how they always and forever fail in what they try to achieve, we will hold them back.
Now if you observe Exhibit B, which is the curve of our league position, and you grab a pencil and finish the curve according to where it's pointing, we will finish in 18th position.
The question is now, assuming we only one want to spend one year in Segunda, who will deliver us from this hell?
UPDATE: The above prognosis is now on shaky ground ever since we were cured of Koemanitis. There's no telling what may happen now!
Now, thanks to Koeman's kung fu, we are in not such a delectable position. It's a bit like a parent going from "is my kid gonna make it to college?" to "is my kid gonna be a beggar in the street?". Not quite the development you might wish for.
We are six short rounds from the end and it doesn't look good at all. I give you attached Exhibit A, our impressive league form. Based on which I will (and you, at your leisure, may find it amusing to do likewise) fill in the scores for our remaining matches.
Athletic -- Valencia 3-1 => 5-1
Athletic, do we ever beat them, even on good form? They are way too badass for us, especially now.
Valencia -- Osasuna 0-1 => 3-0
Yet another no brainer that will go the same way as Almeira, Racing and the others.
Barcelona -- Valencia 2-2 => 6-0
What we lack in efficiency, we make up for in holding grudges. Even though Barcelona is already completely out of the race, we will still insist on being the unwelcome guest.
Valencia -- Zaragoza 2-1 => 1-0
Zaragoza should be fighting for their life. Instead they are wallowing in depression at the inevitable. They will take one last shot at staving off relegation, and we will find just enough energy to put them down.
Levante -- Valencia 1-0 => 1-5
Levante is doing even worse than Zaragoza. In theory, this could be our chance to push off the bottom of the pool on the shoulders of the guy who's already drowned. Instead, they will rally and overrun us.
Valencia -- Atlético 1-1 => 3-1
Atletico is the laughing stock of the country. This year we are so sad no one would even laugh at us. But since they are hunting for a CL spot, and seeing as how they always and forever fail in what they try to achieve, we will hold them back.
Now if you observe Exhibit B, which is the curve of our league position, and you grab a pencil and finish the curve according to where it's pointing, we will finish in 18th position.
The question is now, assuming we only one want to spend one year in Segunda, who will deliver us from this hell?
UPDATE: The above prognosis is now on shaky ground ever since we were cured of Koemanitis. There's no telling what may happen now!
