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Discussion Starter #1
You like a girl, but you're not sure if they like you anymore...

well the girl says she doesnt like you anymore, but the next day she says she actually does like you and that shes a little confused, but you're still not sure

what do you do?

I am now just not going to contact her first, If she wants to talk to me she can, I mean I really like this girl but Im not one for trying to hold on to relationships, and so if she really likes me, thats how it goes and I will feel very happy, if she doesnt she wont contact me anymore and it will be over and oh well but this is how things go...

1 more thing though, girls like attention, i spoke 2 a mate (girl) about this and she said that if I didnt contact her then she woudl miss the attention I give her and automatically speak 2 me or whatever and this is maybe what I want and is the reason why I wont contact her first, but at the same time if she only contacts me because she wants attention, then she doesnt really like me I suppose...

but now Im confused as I dont know what I want

ahhh im waffling now aint I :dontcare:

Anyone give me advice???? please :)
 

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You are doing the right thing, Dean. :)
If she has said she doesn't like you, she knows you still have that thought in your head even if she changed her opinion afterwards. If she actually does like you, she'll want to forget about what she said and go forwards by calling you and showing that she didn't actually mean it. If you give in first then its bad even if she does like you because it will appear you are trying too much to get her to like you again. And if she doesn't, I'll just get her annoyed, and you upset, really.

I hope I make sence. :)
 

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Discussion Starter #3
indeed and thanx!

She said about over a week ago that she didnt really like me anymore

but as I said, the next day she liked me again or so she said)

And for the next few days everything was fine, but then I started to feel she didnt like me again, even if she never actually said anything to me, its as if she gets bored of me easy which isnt a good thing so I just left it for a couple of days, didnt contact her or anything, and all of a sudden she started to call/text me again alot lol, I gave her a present also for xmas but at the moment she is the 1 contacting me first instead of the other way round

so my friends theory of the girl missing the attention is right

But I just dont think she will really like me in the long-term in that way... pretty sad but its the way im feeling and to be honest, if I feel like this then theres no point really!!!

Anyway thanx for ur reply

Im sounding very childish, but arent all relationships? :D
 

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Pretty much, up to the serious ones where marriage comes to mind. (I think)

By what you have said, she seems pretty mentally energetic at the moment. It seems true she is looking for attention and maybe other people she has tried to get it haven't really given it to her so she overloads you with all of it. I don't think she will last long I'm afraid, but don't say there is no point. There is always point to every small relationship I have noticed, you learn something new every time. My advice would be, keep it until it lasts but don't get too serious because you will end up regretting it. :)
 

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Discussion Starter #5
Thats what i try to say to myself

but as soon as I see her, she is so beautiful, so I cant help thinking of being serious :eek: :D

mentally energetic... maybe, she is actually pretty confused at the moment and she doesnt feel much is going right for her, which can explain her wanting the attention, but at the same time not wanting me too close to her... its a difficult girl indeed! But 1 I at times think I should just give up on, or 1 I really know I shouldnt

either way Im just gonna give her the space she may need and if she wants to talk, thats fine :)

thanx for your help Raven :)
 

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No problemo! ;)
 

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Story of my love life Part 1, Dean. She's perpetually putting things in doubt, one day she dances on a feet, the next she dances on the other. As I see it, you should avoid problem girls (problem girls are more subject to doubt gnerally) as much as you can and hunt on other grounds. When a somebody is unhappy, that somebody hardly bothers trying to make those around happy.

Ciao.
 

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Deanfio said:
1 more thing though, girls like attention, i spoke 2 a mate (girl) about this and she said that if I didnt contact her then she woudl miss the attention I give her and automatically speak 2 me or whatever
Only if she has some real interest in you. :) If I am neutral towards a guy, I wouldn't be bothered if he gives me attention or not. And if I don't like him, I would appreciate it if he doesn't give me any attention at all.

I'm kinda shy in front of a guy I like, but I will naturally want to speak to him, cos I enjoy seeig his face, being with him, etc. Playing hard to get is always, ALWAYS a bad idea. :)

Seems like she is confused and uncertain (a very female trait, that :D). I can't explain it cos I am very black and white in such matters - I either like him or I don't.

But whatever she/you feel or say, it is best checked by cold counsel. :) It may seem cynical, and the girl you fancy may be the exception rather than the rule, but majority of my girlfriends who are in a confused state do/say things they would renege on later. Go for it if you will, but don't pin too much hope on it until things are on a more certain footing.
 

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Discussion Starter #9
stephañho said:
Story of my love life Part 1, Dean. She's perpetually putting things in doubt, one day she dances on a feet, the next she dances on the other. As I see it, you should avoid problem girls (problem girls are more subject to doubt gnerally) as much as you can and hunt on other grounds. When a somebody is unhappy, that somebody hardly bothers trying to make those around happy.

Ciao.
You may be true, but I wont just leave her if shes unhappy because shes been upset by something, shes not a problem girl, well I doubt it anyway, shes just upset by something, shes already said it wasnt me and I hope not :D

When she said that she didnt like me anymore, she didnt say it like that, she said that she really thinks im sweet etc. (this might be a lie to make me more calm who knows :D ) but then she sed she is just confused and upset at the moment and her bro and parents have been upsetting her... and that id she isnt feeling up to it anymore, then she cant help how she feels

so I just comfortted her, more than be angry, as I am this type of person :) lol

Well as I said the next night she said I am the nicest person anyone could meet and that she really liekd me again

But as I said Im just not really sure and Im just gonna let her do the chasing if she wants... this way it will say alot to whether she does really like me :D or not :) if she doesnt then I will feel slightly hartbroken, but less heartbroken that I would be if I was chasing her up and she just rejected me :(
 

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Dean: Depends how old you and her are somewhat, and what you ultimately would like to see the relationship end up in.

For me... some years ago I'd play your game and see how hard to get would fair, and I agree with your friend about the attention part. Many (but obviously, fortunately, not all) girls for some reason or other wants a guy who shows how he could well manage without. Adds an element of confirmation once they "bring him back", and it's also true that if you're always 'nice' you'll eventually bore a woman.

But still... if it's a serious relationship you're going for... stuff like "I don't really love you anymore"... is really not something you can get out of easily. You will always doubt her yourself, and she'll eventually doubt herself again. In the long run it's rarely worth it, but of course one shouldn't throw everything away if there could be off the charts reasons for her being down on the particular time of which she said that. But generally I think that line spells the end of the good times. At least that's my own experience, and it corresponds well with those of my best friends (male as well as female).
 

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Deano, this is apparently a chick who thrives on attention and plays games to get it (bar being actually confused or whatever). You can give her the attention and feed into it, but do that and you'll be forced to play that game for hte rest of the relationship. Definitely let her come to you.
 

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Discussion Starter #12
thanx for the replies :)
 

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Never leave her the impression you care more for her than she does for you. Otherwise you're exposing yourself to nasty games.

Believe me Dean, I recognize myself in this. Assuming we're more or less the same age, these are supposed to be our best years. But they all but won't if you keep torturing yourself with a relation that's not worth it. Unless of course you're really mad about her -which I'm guessing isn't really the case.

As Glen commented, there's nothing worse than doubts. It needn't be about her security or her cvetting someone else, constantly doubting her genuine sentiments is about as painful and as I see it, things won't get any better on the long run.

You probably deserve better. :)
 

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Discussion Starter #14
Yes you lot are all making me feel it really isnt worth it, and I dont think it is... To be honest Im not really bothered for this right now... as I said thanx for the replies and opinions on this!!!
 

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It is well known that beautiful girls are just too used to being the center of attention. She contacts you just because she is trying to get what she believes she deserves. The whole thing has to do with one word - attention. Not love. If she likes you for sure, you can tell from her determination. Keep cool and don't take it seriously.

There are two ways you can grow - one is to learn from other people's experience, the other is to commit the error yourself. :D
 

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I'd go for the girl.
If you really like her I mean.
Just call her, tell her what you really think, ask her what she really is into (that means not accepting the typical "I'm confused" or so on bull).

Conversation usually solves things.
 

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Totally agree that conversation in an actual growing relationship is great, but DO NOT profess undying love and then hope she responds. Given that this is a chick seeking some sort of attention, you will most likely wind up with games.

But, if you decide to simply throw your thoughts out there and leave it at that, then it's ok. Just talking from experience, anyway.:)
 

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Deano said:
You like a girl, but you're not sure if they like you anymore...

well the girl says she doesnt like you anymore, but the next day she says she actually does like you and that shes a little confused, but you're still not sure

what do you do?

I am now just not going to contact her first, If she wants to talk to me she can, I mean I really like this girl but Im not one for trying to hold on to relationships, and so if she really likes me, thats how it goes and I will feel very happy, if she doesnt she wont contact me anymore and it will be over and oh well but this is how things go...

1 more thing though, girls like attention, i spoke 2 a mate (girl) about this and she said that if I didnt contact her then she woudl miss the attention I give her and automatically speak 2 me or whatever and this is maybe what I want and is the reason why I wont contact her first, but at the same time if she only contacts me because she wants attention, then she doesnt really like me I suppose...

but now Im confused as I dont know what I want

ahhh im waffling now aint I :dontcare:

Anyone give me advice???? please :)
No doubt this came about through a phone conversation. Do like Bobby here suggests - just pick her up. Conversation = no tagging dat ass. Silent, mysterious act = her foot prints all over the car's foggy windows.

You do the math.
 

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Jesus. Lovely image.



No really, I mean it. MAybe I'll give this chick a look-see. :D


True, a msyterious act could lead to an eruption of orgasmic bliss (your's.....forget her gettin' hers for now....she played the games remember?), but if there is no agreement on her end then you stand to be laughed out uncontrollably or, depending on your chosen statement of intention, arrested for harassment.


Ah, young love.......;)
 
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