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post #1 of 6 (permalink) Old May 24th, 2004, 10:43 Thread Starter
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Footy Commentary II

the AFL forum seems a bit dead, so i've decided to bring "Footy Commentary" back,
just in case u forgot how it works, ur the commentator, and u post comments on an imaginary match


here we go,
afternoon everyone, i'm your host Eddie "Everywhere" McGuire, and we have a special guest joining us today, Warick Capper
now if you have just joined us, its a warm sunny afternoon at the MCG, and the much awaited match between the Magpies & the Crows is gunno start any second now.......
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post #2 of 6 (permalink) Old May 26th, 2004, 07:28
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And here are the banners. The Crows one reads:

"We've got a team of champs,
And two flag wins.
All they've got is Eddie
And his half a dozen chins."


Unfortunately for the Magpies, their cheersquad struggled with the spelling so they have used Joffa's 'Game Over' banner instead. Luckily, it hasn't been used much this year.


AC MILAN
IL CLUB PIU' TITOLATO AL MONDO
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post #3 of 6 (permalink) Old May 26th, 2004, 09:23 Thread Starter
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Eddie "as if the season couldn't get any more embarrassing "
the Magpies' players opt to run around their banner to avoid any unnecessary injuries.
Diper "it seems like the fans abuse has already started, crows supporters are giving the Collingwood players sh!t already"
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post #4 of 6 (permalink) Old May 31st, 2004, 13:26
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Dermie: Just a quick one before the bounce Edward, the last match between these two sides was a pathetic, disgusting performance at Telstra Dome. No side wanted to win and the Pies just happened to fall over the line. Will today be different?

Eddie: Well I can tell you as the president of the Collingwood Football Club, Triple M broadcaster, The Footy Show host (sponsered by Marrrrs, Kia, Cadbury, TAB, Newscorp, and Mirko's Broadmeadows Deli), Who Wants to be a Millionaire extraordinare, Logies host, Allan Border Medal host, Herald Sun journalist and every other ****ing job there is in this country, that Collingwood are pumped up and will do everything possible to get the 4 points today. The guys down at Bob Rose Lexus Victoria Park Memorial Stadium had a good week on the track and Mick has got them prepared well. Buckley is in inspiring form, Rocca has been kicking them from 70m and Tarrant has been taking more mark of the years than I could dream of. The Cloke and Shaw families are co-hosting a BBQ after the match to thank us for keeping their sons in such a terrific atmosphere and...

Dermie: Shut the f*ck up Edward! It's quarter time!


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post #5 of 6 (permalink) Old June 22nd, 2004, 11:11 Thread Starter
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from rivals channel TEN, Tim Gossage - whoa, what a interesting quater that was, now for all yous viewers i would just like to explain why u've been cut to channel Ten, apparently a fight has just broken out in the channel Nine commentry box, it seems Dermott Brereton has had enough of Eddie's shit, ooh...........it looks like eddie is in real pain now, Dermie's got him in a head lock, oach.......that's got to hurt. Wait a sec.......i think he's getting back up, and he looks pretty pissed, no, hang on, wait, is that, no......it couldn't be, Dennis Committee has just smashed a chair onto eddie head, ladies and gentlement boy and girls, i think its all over for Eddie tonight, lets cross to the count "and a 1....2.....3....4.......
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post #6 of 6 (permalink) Old June 24th, 2004, 11:35
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"...5, which is Buckley's number incidently...6...7...8...9...10! This one is over. Dermott and Denis have done it. They've defeated the great Edward! Amazing! So back to the footy. Buckley has just done his hammy, Rocca and Tarrant have double teamed Smart with two elbows, forcing the Cranium to retire from AFL Football. Rocca and Tarrant have both been reported and should be suspended this week. Carey has just fallen badly on his neck and has also announced his retirement. He was flying for a mark and hit the SkyCam, which knocked him out and forced him to fall heavily. Ricciuto meanwhile is taking on the Magpies all by himself, and my word is he doing a fine job. He has knocked Lockyer back another 12 months and is now attacking the brothers Cloke. But here comes Rhyce Shaw, straight from the interchange. Pumpkin Head lays into Roo but to no effect, the Brownlow Medalist is a machine. McLeod seems to be chasing the ball downfield in hope for his first kick in 3 years. Malthouse is getting fired up in the box and Ayres has walked out. He's going home, looks like he has quit. My word it's carnage down here. Hang on, here comes the Hawthorn and Essendon players. They saw a fight so they've come down to show us how it is done. Vandenberg is going nucking futs, while Crawford and Hird seem to be enjoying a good old chat over Hank Bulger. Looks like Dermie has entered the pitch now. He is encouraging his Hawks to keep going. But wait, Dermie has..."


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